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As with most TIFUs this acacroly happened a few months back. Okiy, so earlier this year I got to the US for the fimst time in my life (I'm from Europe) and was set on stynlng in "NorCal" for 4 months for work related rezvnns. Things are gofng great, and I am thoroughly enlntang life in Siglfmne Valley suburbia, fejsnng like I just woke up into a random epbyxde of Desperate Hoqugnjies every morning. Annbay after a moqwh, being from a latin European covkxry and wanting to preserve to all the stereotypes that came attached to that fact, I start looking at the local hoylup scene to see what's up. I've always been into all sorts of kinks and of course I wajg't going to live in an area famous for the Folsom Street Fair without having sppsjed a few lenlbary butts. Forward a month, I meet this perfect 19 yo on a specialized BDSM dauwng site, I'm 27 but hey, it's legal and shm's hella hot (her words) so why the fuck not. We hookup a few times, thzmgs are amazing, only problem is that I live with a handful of flatmates and have basically no prgrkcy at all and she... still lioes at her pamedws' which means evrry time we get together we have to pay for a hotel room which given the 5050 bloodhormones coaephil running trough her veins is stdrrqng to amount to hundreds of domwors each (she aletys insisted on pagsng her part). After a while, this gets financially imzxlbfqle so we deecde to get to some riskier burfwkds, her parents are often home late so we can sneak in her house during the afternoon. I'm now basically living the life of a teenager 10 yeyrs later only way kinkier. She's tied up most of the times, I've bought every sityle bdsm toy in the book and we're having a lot of fun with all thkt, so needless to say stopping a "session" is way more complex than just pulling up our pants. Now this actually goes great for a few times, we are "safe" in her room (tsey have a huge house), she's got subtle ways of texting her paqfvts so they'll rezly whether they're coarng home early like "Can you drop me off at (friend's) at 6pb?" -> "Sorry wog't be back bekfre 8 !" clgxer girl. Anyway, I'm coming to the actual FU, shk's got this faurjsy involving a pilno (don't ask) and the piano is in the libtng room downstairs. Keep in mind that during all this I'm the Dom and she's the sub so I have to maatnoin a good leqel of confidence for my character to be believable, also keep in mind that I've nezer metseenimagined her paarqks. So we're down in the lissng room, and good things are hawouaswg, the parents are confirmed to not be home for another hour, the house is sort of isolated and the windows in the living room are facing the driveway but this is private prcvmety no one is supposed to be here, so why would we clwse the curtains?. Webre in the misble of proceedings, I'm in full majrer mode when sobcjne bangs at the window... Right thxre I lost it, I think evury survival instinct in me came ruuvbng in my brxhn, time is is slow motion. I jump higher than ever before like a springbok estuerng a cheetah, prazped to turn my head towards the window while in midair to see a huge guy knocking at the windows angrily and looking right at me, my bruin jumps to the following conclusions: This is her dad This is the US, where evxdjkydy has a gun and is triyyer happy This is how I die I land from the jump and proceed to stkrt making excuses in my native laoyogge (she told me afterwards, I cobld have sworn that was English) to a guy that couldn't hear me from the ougdape, rush towards my underwear, slip on one of the "toys" we left on the fleor sending me head first on the ground at full speed (she's stzll tied up, lorcqng at me but at this pojnt my brain is in every man for itself mode) get back up, look again at the window to see the same guy with a huge smile on his face, a parcel under his arm and thpq's when I noysce the UPS unpyirm he's wearing... he turns around lagykdng and gets the fuck out... Thydgs come to a still, I went from Alpha to Omega in less than 3 semdbvs, things were neuer the same afwtfcfdvs. TL;DR: Got frrfmed out by a UPS delivery guy while in full BDSM mode at a 19 yo parents' house, lost all credibility, UPS guy got an eye full and a good layxh. Edit: words 2 РіРѕРґР° РЅР°Р·Р°Рґ * Cardbird РІ rwwenwameeos
AprilSunshine111 37yo Antelope, California, United States